Do you struggle with forgiving yourself?

I have a memory that keeps all the wrong records. I can literally bring alive a memory where I wronged someone or I thought I did.

The guilt can be overwhelming and paralysing, it steals our joy and denies us the opportunity to live today and hope for tomorrow.

I read Pastor Simon Mbevi's book on making prayers an adventure and stopped on a certain line. He said that once God forgives us, we should accept this forgiveness". These words rang in my heart and I wondered how many times I had gone before God asking for forgiveness yet I refused to receive it.

We do so by revisiting the sin over and over and allowing the devil to paralyse us into believing there is no way we could have been forgiven.

What exactly happens when we ask God for Forgiveness?

God forgives and forgets
Is 45:25 “I, even I, am he who blots out
    your transgressions, for my own sake,
    and remembers your sins no more.

Imagine trying to find something already blotted.
Imagine a forgotten incident being revived and God closed that chapter.
God forgives us and forgets our sins.

Heb 8:12 For I will forgive their wickedness
    and will remember their sins no more.”[a]

Heb 10:17 Then he adds:
“Their sins and lawless acts
    I will remember no more.”[a]

The prayer we should make is for Him to help us believe when unbelief creeps in.

God has already chosen to forgive us and forget if we repent
Micah 7:18-19
18 Who is a God like you,
    who pardons sin and forgives the transgression
    of the remnant of his inheritance?
You do not stay angry forever
    but delight to show mercy.
19 You will again have compassion on us;
    you will tread our sins underfoot
    and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.

It is God's joy and delight to forgive us. We should always run to Him when we sin and as He forgets, so should we. Our memories might remain but instead of guilt these should remind us of the grace of God in our lives.

God has already invited us to receive freedom and cleansing from sin
Is 1:18 “Come now, let us settle the matter,”
    says the Lord.
“Though your sins are like scarlet,
    they shall be as white as snow;
though they are red as crimson,
    they shall be like wool.

What a great love for us God has that He invites us into His presence in our sinful state. He guarantees the cleansing of our sins.

Faith in us is accepting this mercy and living as He says we are, cleansed from sin.

God addresses our fear of returning to Him when we sin
Is 44:22 I have swept away your offenses like a cloud,
    your sins like the morning mist.
Return to me,
    for I have redeemed you.”

When we sin, we naturally tend to hide from man and God. God in His compassionate nature reminds us to return to Him. He has already paid a price for our sins so we should not allow sin to kill us in any aspect.

We are redeemed! Praise Jesus our Lord.

God secures us from the destruction of sin
Is 38:17 Surely it was for my benefit
    that I suffered such anguish.
In your love you kept me
    from the pit of destruction;
you have put all my sins
    behind your back.

Sin destroys us and causes us so much pain. Those near and far are affected by our sins too. That is why we should run to God when we sin and ask for forgiveness.

He loves us so much and is always looking forward to our turning to Him in total surrender and when we do so, He deals with our sins, forgives us and does not remember them anymore.

Let us stop searching for our sins, God has forgiven us
Jer 50:20 In those days, at that time,”
    declares the Lord,
“search will be made for Israel’s guilt,
    but there will be none,
and for the sins of Judah,
    but none will be found,
    for I will forgive the remnant I spare.

Instead of searching for our sins, let us focus on so great a loving God who has done such a marvellous act of forgiving our sins.
Let us boldly worship Him who has cleansed us and taken away our sins.

Prayer
Dear God, many of us believers in the Lord Jesus have been battling with guilt and not accepting the forgiveness that You have assured us when we repent. We ask for forgiveness and Faith to let go of the sin, guilt and shame and live as You have said, a sanctified people.

When the enemy tries to pull us back into guilt, help us to run and hide in the blood of Jesus and allow your word to remind us of the truth that sets us free. Teach us to speak to that voice of guilt in our hearts and minds that "It is written"....

In Jesus name, Amen.